*kA-cHiNg*

Dear bloggie,

hey bloggie, sup? I know it's a little too early for me to blog since i'm always doing it at night. Time for a little change i suppose from my regular ol' self. currently enjoying a few songs my new foster brother gave me ^_^ one i very much enjoy is The Eagles' Hotel California. It just gives me the relaxing sea side image yet it also sounds a little sad... Oh well. Other few songs are Sara Bareilles' Love Song, Rob Thomas with Little Wonders from the 'Meet the Robinsons' and a couple of others.

It was a pretty nice morning since my dad got up about 8 today and we were in the air cond. room ^_^ It's just terrible when he gets up and start making noises when everyone is still asleep! "dadddddddy!" He was talking to mummy about football and the Man. U. won >_> whattahewl. Don't wanna bother. Anyway, got up about 9 when daddy was complaining that he was hungry...

Mummy was like, "you don't get up means no breakfast,"

Stretching, i answered her blurringly, "Oh duwan" LOL XD I just loved her reaction when i said that, "HUH?" hehehe...

Cleaned up and changed from pajama's to breakfast 'baju' *^_^''* then called mum to join us. Went to breakfast at... "Aunty Teresa's place" lol ok fine at USJ 14.

After we sent mum back, daddy had to go to the bank at Taipan to settle soemthing where else i wondered off to the hardware shop at the corner. Manage to find the glue gun i wanted yay~ And the refill as well. I thnik mel2 wanted it too. I'll show her the sample and see if she's interested.

The whole reason why i wanted to type out bloggie is because i'm feeling very guilty. For some reason, many people have spending A LOT last month and will be spending a lot this month as well. Sen Ee came that day and was complaining and telling us how much she has to spend on her kids and her house. Jin Hoe has tuition for all science subs, his teeth, his MIA watch and etcs; Not to forget dear Suet Leng or better known as Amanda Chan these days who also need to spend for tuition and her wonderful usage of correction tapes~ Not bad for a form one kid to use up 6 correction tapes which is not a very cheap brand for only ONE month~ weeeee~

Mum herself is spending so much now that she has to make new glasses for herself and dad since they haven't had a nice new one for maybe a years. Not only that but Ah Kuu is shifting to his new home and mum has to spend on new furniture as well... She took almost forever to choose a nice set (cupboard, bed, mattress, side table, dressing table) because, i would have to agree with her as well, she hasn't had the chance to choose a really good set and this is her not first but maybe the last chance to. We have Ah Jin ko ko as well who needs to spend on his college uni needs.

Ah Kuu, i don't have to mention that he's shifting to Kemuning Utama which is a semi-D and guarded~ Yea, we've been to his new house before its renovated but its on the way~ This summer, Ah Mun and i will be spending our holidays at his place ^_^ Before he shifts, i have to go over to his current place to help Ah Ma pack his shelf of books... But it's ok. Since i AM having my sem break this weekend ^_^ it'll be pretty fun to pack up anyway (to a bigger place >_>).

Oh yea i forgot about Daniel! He has to spend like all the money in the world just to have his, *ehem* projects done in a *EHEM* PROFESSIONAL way (eh daniew =3). We had a conversation where i was telling him how i would make greeting cards for my relatives or during festivals like CNY, Christmas or etc. He then commented me by saying that he has to do all his work PROFESSIONALLY. The spray glue thingy and some other materials as well. Show offffff... I was being cheeky and kept teasing him by calling him, Mr. Professional or the infamous name calling phrase i have for him *clears throat*, Mr. Professional-who-is-a-student-from-MMU-who-is-also-majoring-in-Creative Media-who-has-to-use-so-MANY-materials-to-be-PROFESSIONAL.Hehehehehe... Poor him. I just LOVE teasing him that way! XD Mmhm, so yea. He has to spend a lot as well this month since he's in his last sem as well and about to have his finals in about two weeks time.

Back to the main topic which is spending, and me being guilty. I PITY my father badly because he has to work like a donkey (no offence but it's just true) for us (family). He doesn't only pay for my mum's medical bills and medicine but her teeth which needs crowning because she WAS suppose to go but... And then Ah Mun because of her Karate, Pengakap uniform, etcs she need for school and a few other things i can't remember. Then there's my "ah maa" who's now at the Seniors Home who spends pretty much as well. Not to forget me who needs to spend for my college books, college fees. Talking about college fees, i really hate the idea of using PTPTN though... They are charging us for taking loans. Well thats normal. But those who are borrowing are rich buggers who would "accidentally" forget to pay back. This loan if for US who needs money to pay for our college fees badly. THEY have to make OUR life harder by doing this! FUCK THEM!!! What is wrong with the human species?? Fuck it.

My dad has been spending just so much last month and he just bought me the glue gun i needed to make Syam's cards... He's just not getting any younger and has to strive so hard just to pay for our expenses PLUS things nowadays are not getting any cheaper. What is wrong with the world? It's not that i can stop doing something that would save the cost! And the weather which isn't getting and colder is making things worse! We're not POOR but we just prefer to save cost by having only one air cond. in the house which is in mummy and daddy's room. When he thinks it's hot, we'll carry our pillows and blankets and pull the mattress' down and sleep together in that room.The air cond. has to run and so does the electricity bill.

I hate to see my family members suffer and to see my dad strive is worse. It hurts so badly that he works so hard and for his age which is 53 this year, he's skinny. He works so hard and rather starve for us and give us the food instead. What in this world did he do for him to suffer like this? It is just so unfair sometimes. If fact all the time. I love him so much and i feel so ungrateful sometimes. Especially now... I WILL and with all my strength that i still have will study hard and be someone when i get out of college so that he will be able to enjoy life when he gets older in the future, ONCE I GET OUT OF COLLEGE.

It's just sad that we have to work so hard nowadays just to survive in this concrete jungle; Where else some people out there would waste everything in the world without worrying that things would get rough not too long. I HATE it so much when people waste food and leave more than half or less because they don't like it or is already full. TERRIBLE HABIT! ARGHHHHH!

Thats all i have to write for now and maybe until tomorrow. Just feeling so pissed because of all these. God please protect daddy until the day he dies, for he will be strong, young at heart and be the way he is. Thank you so much God for protecting him all these time...! THANK YOU SO MUCH!